Reading Affairs.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

There is this world of happy thoughts and sweet words. Its so beautiful that you even fall in love with its dirt and ugliness. I wonder why, or how could i ever fall out of love with it? how did i leave all those novels midway?
Now that i am back to loving it, i feel like i wasn't being me all this time while away from it.

All it took was 5 pages of confusion from To Kill A Mocking Bird. Like i mentioned earlier, it did nothing to help cure the headache but it did make me consider if the headache was all i needed to get fixed.

That bookworm who thought sitting in the school ground during a cricket match, reading a novel will make you look cool not retarded, is resurfacing. I am SO excited to be that person again who dreams about squirrels and wakes up claiming to have had the best dream ever.

This post is turning out to be just enough of a blend of confusion and fun. Winter fun, when sighs are cold yet warm. haha!

I Love God for this and everything <3

Of Apples and I

Friday, October 28, 2011

Apples have gained a lot of popularity recently, and we all know whose those 3 famous apples are that everyone talks about.
If apples could speak, they would be cursing people for using them as a part of jokes and labels but still never being given enough importance for the fruit they are.
I love apples. Even though it started as an arranged relation, when the doctor informed my mother that i had iron deficiency and was supposed to have iron rich foods; apples.

I have my own Top #3 Apples list and trust me, they are way better than yours.

no.1 (because i don't like starting the top 3 count backwards. its just annoying)

Friends ♥
Joey ♥
Joey's apple ΡΌ
how can other apples be loved more than that is beyond me.

no 2

Oh how much we owe to this apple. The apple which keeps the doctor away. i do, a lot. True story.

no. 3

THE APPLE. which tastes oh-so-awesome. Ok, actually i just had this apple the other day and it looked so beautiful i had to snap a few pics of it. Then the 5 minutes i spent attempting to make my phone's camera's product look a little better. It rightly deserves this position.

Class in 15 mins. dont have time to prepare breakfast now =/ Guess what im going to eat then?:)
Not an apple. ha.ha

Disclaimer: Resemblance of the last two apples to any other supposedly famous apple is purely coincidental. They would have not intended to copy my picture. Even if they did, I being the bigger person forgive them.

Another Friday evening.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Friday evenings are the best part of the week for me.
I have my Al huda class every Friday evening and on the way back as i look at the same old roads through the car's window, everything looks so beautiful, so much better. All the dirt that had been collecting in me since the last 7 days, it is blown away by the air blowing in through the window.
Today during the same journey back home from my 'Reality Touch' class, I took out my phone and started deleting stuff to make space so i could take pictures of the sky(Bad-phone-days). It looked ever so beautiful, i have never seen so many colours so well distinguished on it.. but then, that is what i always think while looking at Islamabad's evening sky.
I couldn't take the pictures because all my phone's camera lens could capture was blank dark nothing-ness, but it didn't really matter. In fact that wasn't even supposed to be a part of this post. Anyway, instead of going home, i was informed that we have to go to the market to do some stuff my brother needed done and i happily agreed thinking i would get myself a good cup of coffee from there.
The place where we were supposed to go to turned out to be right next to OPTP so i decided to have their fries instead. There were a bunch of guys standing on the counter when we reached and they were still there when we were going back, so i figured out the place was taking too long in making their food so it was better to just not order from there.. also those guys were kinda creepy.heh.
We couldn't get the work done which we had went for due to which moods had shifted a little towards the darker side and i couldn't ask to be taken anywhere to get anything, so i had to return home with unsatisfied hunger AND thirst.
In the end i had to make both; fries and coffee myself. While i was at it, i remembered how this seems so much better in winters.. how not getting a coffee burn on the tongue is a disappointment in winters whereas the same burns make one curse in the summer.
Winters are truly love and i cant wait to experience the Friday evenings of this one. =)

Here is to winters :D


Friday, September 30, 2011

I believe in fate. In destiny.. yet i know we all shape ours ourselves. Like the title i chose for this post; it popped up on my twitter time line just when i decided to write a blog post. It was like being presented to me for putting it on my post, i had no idea what my post was going to be about and this word with its meaning suddenly appeared in front of me as i stared at the screen with a blank mind. So i can say this title is a work of fate. On the other hand, i was not compelled by anyone or anything to choose it, i saw it, i thought over it, i changed it from 'Se Retirer' to 'Retirer'and then i decided to go with it. Its fate which gave me the word, but its me who decided what to do with it. Its me writing this post as i wish, but its ending, its 'destiny', has already been determined by God. I can write whatever i like and i can erase what i have written as i will, yet God knows what it will be in the end, but He isn't forcing me to do any of it..

as the ice froze
it gained a glow
somewhat borrowed
yet so pure

my hand rose
floating like a vision
it took its course
as i stood and watched..

it shimmered,
in a shiver

in a puff of breath
flew away my hope

witnessing the soul so raw,
incomplete vision,
i had to withdraw.


Saturday, August 20, 2011

I have danced on live beats of the Dhol with a blurr of colors all around me and i have danced on the random-est of disoc songs in front of the mirror with my room's door locked but i have never head-banged crazy on 'nothing-ness'.
Nothing that can be heard, at least. Its just head-banging on the high of life, on chocolate and caffeine and laughter and adrenaline.
I have given up listening to music for Ramadan and hoping i will continue without it even after Ramadan (do not argue over the haram or halal-ness of music please). Do not judge me for i am trying to change but my past will still remain as it is.
I still smile and cry but i didn't still expect to be head-banging or moving my fingers on the keys of a non-existent paino or tapping my feat with such a rythem. And its better, better than how it used to be because there is no feeling of guiltiness involved. I am not limited by the direction of the music and there is no pause where the feeling is lost.
I am blessed with the sense to feel the happy beats of life but not everyone is, so yea, i still have to keep the door locked.

Friday, August 5, 2011

I am extremely sleepy. No that is not what this post is about in fact i don't even know what this post is about(like always) but i have really been wanting to write something since the last few months but i mostly forget as soon as i turn my laptop on or if i ever get as far as opening my blog i stare at the blank screen for a few minutes and then log out of blogger.
Mostly i use my other blog for such senseless posts but then nothing is left for this one so i have decided *backspaceeeeeed*. By the way Who likes reading useless and confused thoughts of others?other than me that is.
My life has become so organized and busy lately its getting hard to come up with senseless stuff and yet i refuse to write anything worthwhile tonight.
About the organized life bit yea i am not really missing those endless hours of doing nothing and just thinking how it wouldn't really have made a difference if i did not exist. It would have of course, you wouldn't be reading this if i had not existed! - that is if anyone ever is reading this-
No i love my life and all that m doing with it and i had to get to that so abruptly because my life-with-all-its-usefulness is calling me! bye.

Remember Muslim brotherhood?

Thursday, April 14, 2011

The ban on face-covering in France went into effect last Monday. Don't worry my post is not about that, i am sure you all must have read enough on it already and its not like my opinion matters or anything.
What i noticed was that most of our Pakistani people, while commenting on the ban, said 'We have enough problems of our own, we don't have to worry about what France does.' I was thinking about it and remembered a hadith i had read long ago, it says:

“The Muslim Ummah is like one body. If the eye is in
pain then the whole body is in pain and if the head is
in pain then the whole body is in pain” ~ Muslim and Bukhari

I know i am no scholar and neither am i a perfect momin but i have enough common sense to interpret what this hadith means. Whether its the ban on face-veil in France or the continuous oppression on the people of Palestine it does affect us! Our religion continually tells us about all Muslims being joined together in one brotherhood, does that not mean anything to you? You don't have to go on strikes for them if you don't want to but we all need to realize that everything that happens around the world to any Muslim does affect us.
We need to stop fooling ourselves.

Just a 'Hypothetical' thought...

Sunday, March 27, 2011

You wake up late, after several hours of peaceful sleep, feeling so good and content with everything. You feel like life is treating you so well this day. You go to the kitchen find out that your favorite food is being cooked and you joyfully dig in!

Later the same day you feel tired, wonder it must be cuz of over sleeping and you curse yourself for not getting out of bed when you had once woken up for a bit and went to sleep again for some more hours. The same thing which brought you joy earlier seems to be the only cause of annoyance now... u laze around, waste the day doing random fun stuff and forget you were mad at yourself. You are blessed again.

Before you know it, its night time and you realize you have wasted yet another day without doing any of the important stuff you had planned to. So the whole day has been wasted anyway, lets just start with the work tomorrow and enjoy what is left of today. You go online and read some sad news..  a child getting raped by several men, you lose your mind, yet you are thanking God again and again for the honor He has blessed you with and your faith of abiding His command and protecting your honor is strengthened and so is your hate for the world. But the world has been good to me, no? i should not hate it.. u wonder. Before you have reached a conclusion about your thoughts a friend calls you, you forget everything and start chatting gleefully about all the random things of the world. You mention a person you have recently met and become very fond of and then you wonder would someone, somewhere in the world be talking about you like that too?like your are, about that near-stranger? The thought is pleasing yet disturbing and it is waved off by the new flow of gossip from the other side.

The day has ended and you look back at it thinking yea i dint get my work done but it sure was fun. You forget to thank Allah cuz its the usual deal isn't it? you get good food, you enjoy the nice whether and you have fun with the people around you.. its the usual.. unless right then at the end of the day you get a very bad makes you forget everything good about the day and depression falls on you. You turn to Allah to ask for help and the you realize He helped you, all through the day, with every little thing. You feel so selfish, sitting there pleading for help.. but you realize its not too late.. it never is with Him. You thank Him for everything, even giving you the peace which lead to over sleeping... cuz that is when you realize what true worries of life are, how blessed you normally are. Then you wonder if a greater worry befalls you will you not think of this time, with its worries as a blessed one? and then you thank Him for everything. For the blessings and what might be blessings in disguise, and pray for forgiveness and selfishly mention your desires for the best.