Mattar Pulao Anyone?

As soon as my mother opened the door to let me in, as i got back home from school, after greeting her with salam my first question was "It smells weird, did you cook biryani?" She replied telling me that it was 'mattar pulao', this came as a little disappointment but no worries, I was stuffed after having a hotdog sandwich in school.

Mama said she had intended to give some of the rice to the maids but they never showed up so she was hoping the kids from the 'kachi abaadi' nearby would show up in the street for something and she would give it to them instead. Just as we finished discussing the whole rice issue, we heard some kids in the street and my mama quite literally 'leapt at the opportunity' and called them in. As the two little brothers were leaving, with the rice in one hand and trash bags in the other, I saw the two most adorable little girls walking by our gate. The little boys called to them and told them to come get food too. I couldn't get over their smiles and surprise for several minutes after they left.

I still had not really processed the lesson i was to derive from this experience. I went upstairs to my room. The curtains had been pulled back to let in the rays of the scarce winter sun. Through the window I saw the two little boys, sitting by the side of the drainage canal, amidst the garbage they looked like they were having the time of their lives and there couldn't have been a better place to rest and a better meal to eat.
Seeing this I remembered my reply, after being told that mattar pulao was cooked, had been "I really don't get why people even cook that?(I like meat)."
I felt ashamed of my ingratitude, yet thankful that God had given me a buzzer so quickly to help me identify the feeling and try getting rid of it (Inshallah).


Absorbed in a serious discussion over lunch. ^_^
That's as good as my phone's 5MP camera can get.

Reading Affairs.

There is this world of happy thoughts and sweet words. Its so beautiful that you even fall in love with its dirt and ugliness. I wonder why, or how could i ever fall out of love with it? how did i leave all those novels midway?
Now that i am back to loving it, i feel like i wasn't being me all this time while away from it.

All it took was 5 pages of confusion from To Kill A Mocking Bird. Like i mentioned earlier, it did nothing to help cure the headache but it did make me consider if the headache was all i needed to get fixed.

That bookworm who thought sitting in the school ground during a cricket match, reading a novel will make you look cool not retarded, is resurfacing. I am SO excited to be that person again who dreams about squirrels and wakes up claiming to have had the best dream ever.

This post is turning out to be just enough of a blend of confusion and fun. Winter fun, when sighs are cold yet warm. haha!

I Love God for this and everything <3

Of Apples and I

Apples have gained a lot of popularity recently, and we all know whose those 3 famous apples are that everyone talks about.
If apples could speak, they would be cursing people for using them as a part of jokes and labels but still never being given enough importance for the fruit they are.
I love apples. Even though it started as an arranged relation, when the doctor informed my mother that i had iron deficiency and was supposed to have iron rich foods; apples.

I have my own Top #3 Apples list and trust me, they are way better than yours.

no.1 (because i don't like starting the top 3 count backwards. its just annoying)



Friends ♥
Joey ♥
Joey's apple Ѽ
how can other apples be loved more than that is beyond me.

no 2


Oh how much we owe to this apple. The apple which keeps the doctor away. i do, a lot. True story.


no. 3


THE APPLE. which tastes oh-so-awesome. Ok, actually i just had this apple the other day and it looked so beautiful i had to snap a few pics of it. Then the 5 minutes i spent attempting to make my phone's camera's product look a little better. It rightly deserves this position.

Class in 15 mins. dont have time to prepare breakfast now =/ Guess what im going to eat then?:)
Not an apple. ha.ha

Disclaimer: Resemblance of the last two apples to any other supposedly famous apple is purely coincidental. They would have not intended to copy my picture. Even if they did, I being the bigger person forgive them.

Another Friday evening.

Friday evenings are the best part of the week for me.
I have my Al huda class every Friday evening and on the way back as i look at the same old roads through the car's window, everything looks so beautiful, so much better. All the dirt that had been collecting in me since the last 7 days, it is blown away by the air blowing in through the window.
Today during the same journey back home from my 'Reality Touch' class, I took out my phone and started deleting stuff to make space so i could take pictures of the sky(Bad-phone-days). It looked ever so beautiful, i have never seen so many colours so well distinguished on it.. but then, that is what i always think while looking at Islamabad's evening sky.
I couldn't take the pictures because all my phone's camera lens could capture was blank dark nothing-ness, but it didn't really matter. In fact that wasn't even supposed to be a part of this post. Anyway, instead of going home, i was informed that we have to go to the market to do some stuff my brother needed done and i happily agreed thinking i would get myself a good cup of coffee from there.
The place where we were supposed to go to turned out to be right next to OPTP so i decided to have their fries instead. There were a bunch of guys standing on the counter when we reached and they were still there when we were going back, so i figured out the place was taking too long in making their food so it was better to just not order from there.. also those guys were kinda creepy.heh.
We couldn't get the work done which we had went for due to which moods had shifted a little towards the darker side and i couldn't ask to be taken anywhere to get anything, so i had to return home with unsatisfied hunger AND thirst.
In the end i had to make both; fries and coffee myself. While i was at it, i remembered how this seems so much better in winters.. how not getting a coffee burn on the tongue is a disappointment in winters whereas the same burns make one curse in the summer.
Winters are truly love and i cant wait to experience the Friday evenings of this one. =)



Here is to winters :D

Retirer

I believe in fate. In destiny.. yet i know we all shape ours ourselves. Like the title i chose for this post; it popped up on my twitter time line just when i decided to write a blog post. It was like being presented to me for putting it on my post, i had no idea what my post was going to be about and this word with its meaning suddenly appeared in front of me as i stared at the screen with a blank mind. So i can say this title is a work of fate. On the other hand, i was not compelled by anyone or anything to choose it, i saw it, i thought over it, i changed it from 'Se Retirer' to 'Retirer'and then i decided to go with it. Its fate which gave me the word, but its me who decided what to do with it. Its me writing this post as i wish, but its ending, its 'destiny', has already been determined by God. I can write whatever i like and i can erase what i have written as i will, yet God knows what it will be in the end, but He isn't forcing me to do any of it..




as the ice froze
it gained a glow
somewhat borrowed
yet so pure

my hand rose
floating like a vision
it took its course
as i stood and watched..

it shimmered,
in a shiver

in a puff of breath
flew away my hope

witnessing the soul so raw,
incomplete vision,
i had to withdraw.

HEAD-BANGING ON NOTHINGNESS

I have danced on live beats of the Dhol with a blurr of colors all around me and i have danced on the random-est of disoc songs in front of the mirror with my room's door locked but i have never head-banged crazy on 'nothing-ness'.
Nothing that can be heard, at least. Its just head-banging on the high of life, on chocolate and caffeine and laughter and adrenaline.
I have given up listening to music for Ramadan and hoping i will continue without it even after Ramadan (do not argue over the haram or halal-ness of music please). Do not judge me for i am trying to change but my past will still remain as it is.
I still smile and cry but i didn't still expect to be head-banging or moving my fingers on the keys of a non-existent paino or tapping my feat with such a rythem. And its better, better than how it used to be because there is no feeling of guiltiness involved. I am not limited by the direction of the music and there is no pause where the feeling is lost.
I am blessed with the sense to feel the happy beats of life but not everyone is, so yea, i still have to keep the door locked.

I am extremely sleepy. No that is not what this post is about in fact i don't even know what this post is about(like always) but i have really been wanting to write something since the last few months but i mostly forget as soon as i turn my laptop on or if i ever get as far as opening my blog i stare at the blank screen for a few minutes and then log out of blogger.
Mostly i use my other blog for such senseless posts but then nothing is left for this one so i have decided *backspaceeeeeed*. By the way Who likes reading useless and confused thoughts of others?other than me that is.
My life has become so organized and busy lately its getting hard to come up with senseless stuff and yet i refuse to write anything worthwhile tonight.
About the organized life bit yea i am not really missing those endless hours of doing nothing and just thinking how it wouldn't really have made a difference if i did not exist. It would have of course, you wouldn't be reading this if i had not existed! - that is if anyone ever is reading this-
No i love my life and all that m doing with it and i had to get to that so abruptly because my life-with-all-its-usefulness is calling me! bye.